Kosovo’s Per Capita Kindness

Originally posted on Oct 22, 2020 on medium.com/@shamandao

by archdaily.com

From being one of the most polluted countries in our world to having a primitive mindset, well, one begs the question, “Why Kosovo?”

I’ve been in a complete state of energetic flow for some years now, allowing myself to align with energetic vortexes and ley lines around our world. I remember the moment it happened. The decision that ultimately landed me in Bregu I Diellit, also known as Sunny Hill in Prishtine, Kosovo.

It was December 2018 and a map of Eastern Europe was on my laptop screen. I looked into traveling to Medjugorje in Bosnia. “The local people have seen visions of Mother Mary,” I told my Mom on the phone as she oohed and awed, “We can fly into Paris and stay for a couple of days to eat baguettes and then fly down to Croatia.”

It was then my soul lifted out of my body and landed on a small dot to the right of Bosnia on the map. I zoomed in. Kosovo? Okay, I guess Kosovo, “Hey Mommy, I guess I’m going to Kosovo,” I told her.

“Okay, we will go to Kosovo,” my Mom responded.

“No, I think this is an alone journey,” I replied.

She laughed and then I joined in. Silly, right? It took all of two days to concrete my decision. I booked a one-way ticket to Pristina, Kosovo. I didn’t even google it. With a nice black winter coat, some shiny pleather black boots, an outfit on, and an outfit packed and that was it.

I didn’t even bring my laptop with me.

I said goodbye to my family. We all cried because I felt like a part of me died that day. I knew in my heart and soul, that the next time they saw me, I wouldn’t be the same Carol they knew.

When I arrived in Kosovo in March 2019, I was shocked. Seriously, shocked at all the modern coffee shops. The well-dressed Kim Kardashian look alike’s with full faces of makeup on. There were also little Dua Lipa’s running around. I was shocked because I had an image of rubble roads and village living, but Prishtina was anything but.

As the days turned into weeks, I began to understand more and more of the hearts here. There was and is a lot of kindness here. A lot. As a foreigner, doors are opened for you, especially if you are an American. But I would sit on the back of the number four bus periodically and become an observer. I witnessed the kindness flowing throughout these souls. I saw on numerous occasions, the immediate offering of a seat to an elderly person coming on the bus. I witnessed a pizza delivery scooter go down, and two cars immediately pulled over to help as two other men ran to help said delivery guy.

Children played in the streets all day. By themselves, without a care in the world. There was no fear of kidnapping. If it did exist, it’s hiding somewhere deep in a corner.

There were wallets lost, house and car keys lost, and immediately posted to numerous social networks to find the owner. I even forgot my phone in a taxi one day and I noticed I didn’t worry about getting it back. All I had to do was ask some guys on the street to call the taxi company and within less than five minutes, the taxi came back with phone. The feeling of complete and utter trust was unforgettable.

In a country a wee bit larger than the state of Delaware, the per capita kindness exceeds other states and countries I’ve lived in.

I would like to note, I am not writing this as someone who has rose-colored glasses. I know the underlying and corruption that breeds within this society. I know how deep the cords of emotional, financial, mental dependency and trauma run from generation to generation. I know the mentality of living for someone else and their twenty thousand dollar weddings. In a country where the median monthly income is from three hundred to five hundred euros. I know the primitive mindset of only wanting to marry a virgin, from a man who most likely has had sex with hundreds of women and who will probably cheat on his wife.

With Kosovo’s isolation from their visa issues to disagreements with the neighboring countries, what I know is that there is purity here. Pure hearts who have never gone outside their own country because they’ve already been turned down twice from their visa application. Some of whom don’t even watch YouTube because many channels are banned here, actually, it’s because Kosovo is not recognized as a country or state in many places. As a whole, there’s good and bad. I get called Chinese every other day, but I do not worry about aggression here. Call me Chinese, I’ve been called worst back home.

We live in a world of duality and it comes with the territory.

As the world braces for more of the unknown, we are heading into some dark times. More primitive times. There will be more natural disasters, more hardship and more darkness. Where material scarcity will be more common than material abundance. We’ve already witnessed the first wave of panic, buying obscene amounts of toilet paper.

Developed countries depend on their conveniences. They are accustomed to having everything at their fingertips. Two-day delivery? No, let’s get it down to same-day delivery. What happens when the slightest nuisance comes along? Rage, anger, panic, fights, and downright anarchy.

Kosovars and Albanians have been through war recently. They know how to stretch a bag of wheat flour into entire meals for their family. They know how to open their doors to others to help them in times of crisis. Did you notice what happened last year during the 2019 earthquake in Tirana, Albania? Homes and hotels were opened up to strangers and other families. Food trucks donated from families arrived. It was a group effort to help, all coming together to assist.

It’s a dog eat dog world out there and of all the places in the world, right now, I feel safe in this developing country with a village feel. No need to worry about disappearing in a taxi like other countries. No need to watch my back when I walk at night. No need to worry about being mugged or raped. Almost two years later, there still isn’t a need.

Turmoil exists everywhere right now in our world. I choose to focus on the good and Kosovo has a lot of good. Granted, I have been a target of exploitation from an Albanian woman living in Macedonia for these last couple of days. This woman has used emotional manipulation to demand more money for a stray kitten I rescued off the streets. While on vacation. Reasoning with an unreasonable person from a more primitive minded country is something that does not happen every day, but stuff happens. It’s just how we respond to it and roll with it.

It was the Kosovars kindness and their warmth that intrigued me and then rooted me in place here. It fits and feels right, so that’s why I’m here.